We All Have Curves – Own It

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Image from: http://www.vogue.com/fashion-shows/fall-2017-ready-to-wear/christian-siriano/slideshow/collection#18

I can’t tell you how awesome it is to see real women in ads and on the fashion week runways. It’s about damn time. 

Target and Christian Sirano are some great examples of brands that have embraced the fact that most women have curves and cellulite, and their belly giggles, and that being a size 0 really isn’t a “norm.” Um hi, check me off for all of that (I love carbs)

But now I feel like there is a battle going on with the word “curves.” Curves is synonymous with plus size. ASOS’s plus size line is called “Curves.” One of my favorite movie’s of ALL-TIME is, Real Women Have Curves,” with America Ferrera (if you haven’t seen it, what is wrong with you? Seriously. Watch it, like right now … GO). 

I have zero idea why or when the word “curves” became synonymous with plus size (and we all know how I feel about the phrase “plus size” … and if you can’t recall I fucking hate it). 

I get it, saying you’re “curvy” is a lot nicer than saying you’re fat or overweight. But why? Why are we downplaying our curves? Curves rule. Can you picture a life without curves. YAWN. God gave us taas and an ass for a reason, kids. Jesus, have you watched “Real Women Have Curves” yet? Get on it!

And I get why people were infuriated over the Zara ad that had two stick figures telling the world to “embrace their curves.” I totally get why everyone is pissed. BUT … BUT(hear me out, angry mob) they are women. Who cares if they are skelator status, they have teeny tiny little booties, and hey, that makes for some curves. Yes, I’m going literal with the word here, people, deal.

Look, I want to see all different kinds of women in ads (Zara, get on it). I really do. It’s important for all of us to know that no matter your size, or your percentage of belly fat and cellulite, you’re beautiful. And hey, most belly’s giggle (it’s true, I’m sure even Gigi Hadid’s dumbass stomach giggles). 

Some of the most beautiful art work back in the day was of curvy women. They were considered the “Kim Kardashian-standard” of beauty. Look at this gal by Willem de Kooning below. A woman like this could have been in Playboy back in the day. So next time you think you’re fat, or could loose a few LBs, think of this art. And love yourself a little. Every inch of all of your curves. Give them a little squeeze and remember you’re beautiful.

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I think we all need to start embracing our curviness. And stop immediately thinking curves equals being overweight. If you’re overweight, say you’re overweight. Hey … I’m pretty sure I am (did I mention I love carbs … ain’t no shame in my game). And I’m trying to get healthy, that’s all that matters. But even when I was a size 6, I still had curves … because the lord blessed me (or cursed me, either or) with rather large and in charge taas, or “secret bombs” as my friends like to call them (getting REAL personal over here).

One of the best parts of being a woman, no matter if you are a size zero or a size 24, is that we have curves. Own it and embrace it.

The Carrie Bradshaw Rule of Fashion

worst5When you put on something and think to yourself, “am I too old to wear this,” it’s probably one of the most fucked up moments of life … especially if you just turned 30 like I did. Because when did I get to the point in my life when I thought I was too old for ANYTHING

For me, it was when I threw on a black choker. You know … like the ones all the Jenners and Hadids are rocking (sign number one), and the ones I wore in the early-90s? I took one look in the mirror and immediately saw myself as Josie Grosie from Never Been Kissed, pretending to fit in with all the “rad” high school girls … terribly.

Like thinking about the fact that I could potentially wear the same outfits as my 14-year-old niece honestly makes me physically ill. For me AND for her.

But I didn’t take it off. Nope. I kept that sucker on. Mostly because I was mad at myself for even thinking something like that (pshh I’m timeless :::hair flip::: also, where is my Retinol eye cream?), and because I live life by the “Carrie Bradshaw Rule of Fashion.”

What is the Carrie Bradshaw Rule of Fashion you say? Well gather ’round kids. It’s time for a Life Sucks In A Strapless Bra lesson on life. 

Carrie Bradshaw was not some 20-something frolicking around NYC in her Jimmy Choos. Oh no. That bitch was in her 30s for most of Sex and the City (I feel like people overlook that fact). Which is SO refreshing, because now I feel like all we see are 20-somethings living off their parents money and seeing how they can out-hipster one another whilst “figuring it all out” :::cough cough GIRLS cough::: 

Carrie, Miranda, Samantha, Charlotte … all in their 30s during Sex and the City. Which oddly makes me feel so much better about what I have going on and not going on in my life right now.

So back to the Carrie Bradshaw Rule of Fashion … she had no rules. She made up the rules as she went. 

She wore shit like this:

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Oh and did we forget about this:

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And HELLO … the Cafeteria look where she met the comic book dude!?

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Did she look in the mirror and say, “hmm am I too mature to rock a belt around my middriff?” “I wonder if my 14-year-old niece and her friends are wearing the same thing?” NO. She didn’t give a shit. She made it her own, and made it work. Age was never a factor in her outfits. They were fun, creative, and expressed who she was as a person. And dammit, isn’t that what style is all about?

Chokers are fleeting fashion … I know that for a fact. But right now they fit into my style aesthetic. Will I go around rocking mom jeans and white Adidas Shell Toes? Well that is something that just does not fit into my style profile … sorry Hadid- and Jenner-lookalikes. 

So next time you think you’re too old to rock something, rely on the Carrie Bradshaw Rule of Fashion. As long as you aren’t rocking ties over t-shirts a-la Avril Lavigne … I think we are good. Because that shit is never okay.