I Saw The Tide To Go Light

Sigh … it was just one of those mornings. And I should have known better than to wear a white dress. I avoid white pants, white purses, white EVERYTHING because I am a walking stain magnet. As a child they called me “Stains Concannon,” but I digress.

So I’m at work, and as an editor, hot lemon tea and a red pen are pretty much my weapons of choice. And I am a known pen snob. I have to have the gel-ish dark red pens in order to make a prominent mark, unlike those lame Papermate ones.┬áSo I go over to ask a co-worker a question, paper and red pen in hand … standing at her cube, not realizing that the tip of my red pen is aimed right at my chest. And as I am right about to turn around and go back to my desk, the red pen makes contact with my white dress and leaves a line of death, right across my … well … knockers. As I hung my head in shame and what felt like in slow motion said … “NOOOOOOOOOO,” my co-worker/friend/savior/Jesus hands me a Tide To Go Stick and basically tells me to stop my dumb crying in the nicest way possible.

Now I thought Tide To Go Sticks were just for stopping the stain from ACTUALLY staining. And as I crouched down behind my friends cube (because clearly I was too lazy to walk back to my own desk or the bathroom to do this), I rubbed the Tide To Go Stick over a, well, very uncomfortable place and watched the stain MAGICALLY disappear. Gone … totally … red gel pen completely out of my white, pristine dress.

These are things that Jesus is made of. Women of the world, next to lip gloss, wallet, phone, tampons or whatever else have you … the Tide To Go Stick needs to become the next staple in your purse. It isn’t a mark of shame … in fact I believe it could be a conversation starter. See a cute guy … gets a stain on his shirt, “oh hey, cute guy … here is a Tide To Go Stick,” and boom … conversation starter.

Perhaps I’m like a decade late with this news so don’t judge, but whatever … I had to reiterate how fucking awesome this thing was. Fashion crisis avoided … thanks Tide!